forgetting what lies behind

Have you ever had a conversation with someone which was so good you were torn between hanging on every word and wanting to grab a pen or a tape recorder so that you could capture every word?

I just had such a conversation. I don’t want to forget it, but already so much of it is slipping away from memory. It was more than the meeting of minds or hearts—although it certainly was that—it was the communion of two souls. After Mass today I very much wanted to tell a lady from our parish who I know and like, but don’t know as well as I’d like to know, that I really appreciated her rendering of the Second Reading from Philippians. It’s a difficult selection and she is a superb lector, but today I could hear the Holy Spirit speaking through St. Paul’s words and her voice. It was a God moment.

Before I had a chance to tell her what I thought about her lectoring, we started talking about women, our need to give, the importance and gift of being able to receive, and special women we both know. Then in a very natural way, the conversation turned to the loss of her husband four years ago and her subsequent walk with grief.

This was not one of those conversations with a woman looking for sympathy. Rather it was the shared insight from a truly Wise Woman.

The husband she described sounded very much like my own husband—a wonderful man, loving, considerate, generous, hard-working, always thinking of others before himself. He used to take care of everything around the house, from doing the grocery shopping to scrubbing the bathroom floors. After he died, she would find herself on her knees scrubbing the floors crying ... thinking ... remembering. There are some things in the past which shouldn’t be forgotten.

But when he died she found her real spiritual work began. She needed to learn to develop in areas which she didn’t even know existed, where he’d been strong for her. It was this inner strength, this holy wisdom, this deep spirituality which I heard when she lectored. I drank it in.

I thought too about my own dear husband and felt a moment of panic, sheer terror actually, as I thought of my own potentially impending future, a time to come without him. What would I do? How could I go on?

She spoke of kind people—dear friends—wanting so desperately to help her in her bereavement and how she helped them in allowing them to help her. We both had tears in our eyes and few spilled over as well. She apologized to me! I felt privileged and honored that she would share her story with me.

We talked about judgments and she said how we are all taught to judge everything, from the weather, to people, to situations. But what a different perspective if instead of judging we choose to look at everything as an opportunity from God to grow. “What do you want me to gain from this O LORD?” And she said oh so much more…

Finally I did get to tell her how much I enjoyed and benefited from hearing her lector today, but by the time I did, I had already gained so much more, well … anyway, it made her happy. And for that LORD, I am truly grateful!

‘Remember not the events of the past,
the things of long ago consider not;
see, I am doing something new!’

Sisters-in-Faith

Once upon a time many years ago a little girl was trying to select a Confirmation saint from among the many famous ... and infamous ... Catholic saints. She finally lighted on St. Thérèse de Lisieux or Saint Thérèse of the Child Jesus because of her ‘Little Way’. Fast forward many years and that little girl gives birth to her own first child, a girl, on the Feast Day of The Little Flower of Jesus, as Thérèse is also known. Eighteen more years pass quickly by. The first little girl is middle-aged; her daughter on the threshold of womanhood. The mother thinks she has outgrown her childhood patron saint, so she has adopted a saint she feels suits her age and maturity, Thérèse's senior Carmelite sister, Santa Teresa de Jesus. But saints aren't so fickle as we silly humans. They don't abandon their spiritual children so easily.

I know. I'm that silly little girl who thought she outgrew Thérèse, as if anyone, no matter how old, could ever outgrow the ‘Little Way’.

Two weeks ago I embarked on a new job, more of a career actually. It was a job I'd been offered several times but kept turning down, first because I was still homeschooling my daughters and later because I still wasn't ready for full-time employment. Finally, I was asked a third time to consider this job. I did. It started on the 1st of October, the Feast day of St. Thérèse. That was my first rose. Every day since has been another rose from her ... no not all happiness, but Beauty. To walk the ‘Little Way’ doesn't mean you will travel in peace or comfort or without trouble; it only means you walk with Truth in the Light.

Today is the Feast day of St. Teresa of Ávila or Santa Teresa de Jesus, a doctor of the Church, sixteenth century reformer, who along with St. John of the Cross, was co-founder of the Discalced Carmelites. This was also my first day on my own in my new job. And yet, I knew I wasn't on my own. My two senior sisters-in-faith were there, watching over me. As I've said many times, I believe in the Communion of Saints. We are not alone. Death is not the end.

The Proper 'Hugging' of a Baby

Instructions for properly hugging a baby:

1. First, uh, find a baby...

2. Second, be sure that the object you found was

indeed a baby by employing classic sniffing techniques.

3. Next you will need to flatten the baby

before actually beginning the hugging process.

4. The 'paw slide: to accomplish this technique,

simply slide paws around baby and prepare for possible close-up.

5. Finally, if a camera is present,

you will need to execute the difficult and patented

'hug, smile, and lean' so as to achieve the best photo quality.

6. Prepare to go "Awwwwwwwww!"


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The Shadow of the Bear

Thoroughly delightful, modern retelling of, Snow White and Rose Red, which I am bound to read next. The Shadow of the Bear is set in modern day New York City and "the Bear" wears dreadlocks. The two sisters, Blanche and Rose, recently displaced by their father's death are struggling to fit in at a new (to the girls) inner-city high school.

The best part of the book for me was the beginning because of all of the great quotes and intriguing ideas. It's been far too long since I've read any fairy tales and I'd forgotten the charm their gentle "spells' can weave in reminding us more is going on in Life than work, struggle and overcoming problems.

The author often speaks through her fanciful character, Rose. Here she is speaking to her sister, Blanche and Bear, "Have you ever felt there was something going on in life not everyone was aware of?" Pressed to explain herself, Rose continues, "As though there's a story going on that everyone is a part of, but not everybody knows about? Maybe 'story' isn't the right word--a sort of drama, a battle between what's peripheral and what's really important. As though the people you meet aren't just their plain, prosaic selves, but are actually princes and princesses, gods and goddesses, fairies, shepherds, all sorts of fantastic creatures who've chosen to hide their real shape for some reason or other. Have you ever thought that?" (p. 56)

I'll let you read the book for yourself to see how her audience responded. I know, however, what I think. I think she is on to something.

Although predictable and simplistic, it was good to be reminded by this sweet fairy tale that Good can triumph and there can be happy endings. A definite 'Feel Good' experience. Read and enjoy!

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Advent Angel

Rooftop 'angel' visits Kentucky couple . . . Well why not? It is Advent! Read about it here. Have a Blessed Advent!

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Bambi and Thumper . . .

. . . really do exist.

Thank you Amy!

This summer, after book blogging was patronized in the mainstream media, Amy from My Friend Amy made a suggestion that we celebrate book blogging. From that idea, Book Blogger Appreciation Week was born. Many of us have participated in interviews, contests, give-aways, and through awards; but, this would never have happened were it not for the dream, perseverance, planning, hard work and dedication of Amy. This has been a wonderful week and as members of the Book Blogging community, in one voice we want to thank Amy for all that she has done.

Amy, you are truly the Queen of Book Bloggers and we love you!

The Value of Beauty

If there is one thing I’ve always wanted to give my daughters it’s the knowledge that they are loved—and in turn the ability to love themselves; not conceit, nor narcissism nor self-complacency. No. We aren’t here to glorify ourselves.

But I do hope to instill in my daughters the sense that they are well and truly loved by their parents and that that love (strong as I hope it is!) is still but a weak reflection of the Love of Our Heavenly Father. I’ve never had any trouble convincing them that they are loved by their parents. They know that without a shadow of a doubt; they know their parents would do anything for them. But somehow I’ve never been able to convince one of my daughters that she also needs to love herself. As I have also struggled with this same question myself (at times) I find it wonderful and marvelous that God has brought me where He has for my new job.

It’s always been the booklady’s dream to work in a book store. When homeschooling ended last year, I was sure the time had come for the bookstore job opportunity to present itself. I waited and waited but nothing happened. The bookstore near my home never came. Plenty of other stores opened, but alas, no bookstore!

Finally I received an offer to work in a salon. A salon? A booklady in a salon? Bookladies belong in libraries or book stores . . . but salons? Surely not!

Why not?

Bookladies are everywhere—including salons, I have discovered! I have met them. And I continue to meet them every day I am at work. And best of all, I have discovered that a salon is a place which can give my daughter something that no book can offer her—a sense of her own feminine beauty.

Alas, as a mother I have loved my dear daughters but let them grow up as tomboys. I never placed much emphasis on personal appearance because I wanted my girls to be more concerned with their minds, their hearts and their souls. In short, I wanted them to be intelligent, kind and good. I believe in inner beauty—which is all well and good. Indeed it is the most important thing; I haven’t changed my mind about that. I’ve just come to recognize the value of attending to the outward as well.

Not catering to it or pandering to it, but simply attending to it. And since I have declared a truce in this area, I can better help my girls grow into young ladies who feel good about their own feminity and grateful for the gift of their God-given beauty. Not to mention, I love seeing my dear Meg looking so elegant—and this was just for the hair stylist to ‘practice’ for an upcoming big event. Doesn’t she indeed look lovely?

Reconstructing Natalie

by Laura Jensen Walker

Started: 12 March 2008
Finished: 20 March 2008

You have to admit Reconstructing Natalie is an unusual title for a book. My sister, Julie, recommended this book and I knew in advance what it was about—breast cancer. I get a lot of good book recommendations from both of my sisters. They include spiritual books, mysteries, love stories, comedies and even books on books.

Since I knew what Reconstructing Natalie was about, I was a bit surprised when it started off in such a light humorous vein. Undoubtedly Laura Jensen Walker did that because the overall subject is so heavy, she knew the story needed leaven early on; it did!

Natalie is a twenty seven year old single woman who finds a breast lump one day. Unfortunately in her case, it is not benign. Thus begins her long days’ journey into night. And yet Walker still manages to tell Natalie’s walk through the valley of the shadow of death with great sensitivity and continued sprinklings of wry humor.

Throughout her ordeal Natalie is forced to make choices—about her body, her career, her outlook, her faith—which you may or may not agree with. I don’t happen to agree with all her choices, but then I didn’t have to endure what she did. Even the women in her support group make different choices. For one thing, there is the choice between mastectomy, lumpectomy and/or chemotherapy/radiation — well at least for some women. And even between single mastectomy and double. Following the removal of the cancerous tissue, there is the reconstruction of the new breast(s) or wearing a prosthesis. I never realized there were so many choices open to breast cancer sufferers today. The book is an education in itself.

But the technical aspects aside, I was struck by the devastating personal issues. Natalie and her two closest friends learn to make some hilarious breast jokes, which taken out of context, would seem crude and lewd—but put into perspective are poignant and bittersweet. She has no breasts anymore—if that doesn’t earn her the right to make jokes about them, nothing does. She loses all her hair as a result of the chemo; in moral support, a girl friend, male friend and his son shave their heads.

Through it all, Natalie comes to re-examine and question every facet of her life. Tragedies and turning points have that affect on us. Through reconstruction she regains her outward appearance and then some, but she has no feeling in her new breasts and will never experience the bond of nursing her own babies. Yet at least she survives to have children of her own—so many women with breast cancer aren’t even that blessed.

It is my fervent prayer that all women everywhere read this book and remember the Natalies of the world. So often I hear women talking about having and nursing babies as if every woman can do these things when in fact, so many women cannot. This thoughtless assumption can be so painful for women denied these beautiful and God-given opportunities.

****1/2

dedicated to all the Natalies, Janes and their families and friends. May God watch over and support them in their fight against cancer!

Always Remember . . .

On Life's Darkest Days, it helps to have a Light source to go to. Here is one place I have found.

Give this a minute of your life; you will be blessed at the reminder.

http://www.wisehearts.com/yaam.html

A beautiful priest I know says that sin is moving away from the Light of Christ. May He draw all of us closer to Him.

The Beauty and the Devastation

ICE STORM 2007 ~~ MIDWEST CITY, OKLAHOMA ~~ December 9th-11th (so far)

We've lost a good portion of every one of our trees . . . and we're the lucky ones.